WARNING: CARBON MONOXIDE.




There was a carbon monoxide leak in my apartment last night. Yes, that's right. And what did I do when I heard the detector tell me:


WARNING, WARNING. CARBON MONOXIDE DETECTED.


I took the batteries out. I put the batteries in. I went back to sleep.


A while later, I woke up to the same:


WARNING, WARNING. CARBON MONOXIDE DETECTED.


I took the batteries out. I went back to sleep. I woke up with a terrible headache.


This is bad sleepytime judgement. Be careful out there. Furnaces are neat and everything but you gotta be careful. When you're not looking they will start to conspire against you.


My new furnace is being installed as this is posted. That big bastard was trying to kill me in my own little studio gas chamber.


I wish I was home right now so I could say to it, "Don't let the door kick you in the ass on the way out." And then I'm going to take to the streets to see that bastard never sees another apartment again.